My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I am mentally ready for anal.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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