Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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