Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
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