whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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