singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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