dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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