well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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