so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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