Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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