Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize