i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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