I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
