Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
