so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
