Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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