Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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