I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize