Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
