I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
