Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
