I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
