dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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