the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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