Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
