And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
