they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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