is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize