Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
