is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Randomize
