I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
