I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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