brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
