The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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