just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
