I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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