The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize