Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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