dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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