actually, I'm a sock model
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
