Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
