Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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