Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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