Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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