i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Is Oprah even human
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
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