I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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