She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize