let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
should my penis look like a turkey
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
