Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Randomize
