At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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