oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize