So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
