Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
