I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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