Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
