Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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